What is spirituality?

I believe spirituality is identifying the things that are truly important to you and giving them the priority they deserve.

How to overcome depression?

Some time back I was asked to speak regarding spiritual solutions to depression. Now I know more than most that the word depression covers a myriad of conditions and I hesitate to talk about simple cures. For those that know me I believe there are 6 strategies you need to focus on when trying to manage/ overcome depression: exercise, support from family and friends, psychological counselling, fulfilling work, relaxation/meditation, and medication.

What underpins all these things?

In my own recovery, I found that when I was severely depressed, I was best to focus on exercise and contact with family and friends. As I started to improve, I embraced meditation and this really helped with being centred and seeing things with new clarity. I came to realise that when I looked back to my past, much of my self esteem was tied up with external achievements. When things were going well I was fine and when they weren’t I crumbled. I now believe that striving to be of service to others is the key to my mental health. I’m not saying that this is the case for everyone but I have certainly found it to be true for me.

Who am I?

I have spoken on several occasions with Charlie Hogg, The Director of the Brahma Kumaris in Australia. Over the years Charlie has helped thousands of people learn how to meditate. He says that 80% of the people who come to learn are struggling with depression and/or an anxiety disorder. Many have been trying to find happiness and peace through achievements and material possessions and have found that to be a losing battle. They think of themselves as their gender, occupation, marital status, income level etc. When these don’t measure up with their expectations of the perfect life they feel disillusioned.

Source of Happiness

Charlie has no income, and no traditional material possessions, yet he is one of the happiest and most positive people I know. He truly feels fulfilled when he is serving others. When I was interviewed recently by Richard Fiedler on the Conversation Hour, he made the comment that the happiest people he has interviewed (and his has spoken to an incredible cross section) are those that are dedicated to helping others.

This is no quick fix

What I am describing above is no quick fix, but I believe that finding our what is truly important to you and then spending a lot of your time addressing this purpose in central to sustainable happiness and fulfillment. An important part of this is understanding your strengths and finding out what special skills or qualities you have that you like to use. Martin Seligman did some great work in this area in his book Authentic Happiness - see http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/Default.aspx . At this website you will find some tools to help you understand your strenghts

Brinkmanship

I believe that depression, like any adversity has the potential to be transformed into a gift. If through your pain you are able to come out the other side with new priorities in life and a new mission then I believe you can consider yourself blessed. Don’t get me wrong. I know that depression can be a living hell but like every crisis it can EVENTUALLY be turned into an opportunity. I believe that depression has such a high recurrence rate because people that don’t come to terms with what is important to them and change their lifestyle accordingly have to eventually revisit it.

For an excellent artictle on this subject from the Mayo Clinic please see: http://www.revolutionhealth.com/conditions/mental-behavioral-health/bipolar-disorder/living-with-bipolar-disorder/spirituality-stress-relief?msc=A62687 

If you have a view on this topic, please respond to this post.

KInd Regards

Graeme

Tags: anxiety, back from the brink, depression, depression treatments, graeme cowan, spiritual solutions

This morning Andrew Johns completed his walk from Newcastle to Sydney to raise funds for the Black Dog Institute research and awareness of bipolar and depression.

Raised $2 million

Even though it was a magnificent effort to raise these funds I think Andrew’s greatest contribution was to talk openly about his own experiences. I know from the feedback I have had from BACK FROM THE BRINK, that personal stories help bring down the bricks of stigma. I remember doing  a book signing in Perth where every third person commented that they felt comfortable discussing their depression with family after Geoff Gallop, the ex Premier of WA, admitted to his own struggles with the illness when resigning from parliament.

Real stories move hearts

It may seem like a courageous thing to do but I have been amazed how supportive people have been when discussing my own illness. Inevitably it leads to the person then feeling comfortable discussing their own story of a loved one (or even themselves) - and I now know that everyone has a story.

I encourage you to share your story with family and friends so that we can discuss mental illness as easily as we do physical illnesses. I encourage you to read the story on this topic from the Mayo Clinic in the news section of www.IamBackFromTheBrink.com

Kind Regards

Graeme

Tags: andrew johns, bipolar, depression, mental illness, stigma

After much searching I’ve found a wonderful resource for parents with a teenager with depression. As I shared in the post before last, this is an area which is severely under resourced.

Families for Depression Awareness

http://www.familyaware.org/index.php

This US site was established 16 years ago to help address the issues families encounter when one or more members live with depression. It offers some very practical advice and has many real stories covering a variety of situations.

Guide for parents of a teen with depression

Perhaps the thing of greatest value is an excellent guide for parents who have a teen with depression. It is a 72 page document that answers many of the questions you will have. Most importantly it has been thoroughly “road tested” to make sure it is relevant and practical. At this same location you will also find a very good guide for teens who are suffering from depression.

http://www.familyaware.org/teens/default.php

Please let me know how you find this material.

Kind Regards

Graeme

Tags: depression advice, depression in families, teenager depression, youth depression

It was all going so smoothly

As many of you would know, I had my routine down pat. Rise at 5.45am, meditate for 20 minutes and then go for a 45 minute bushwalk before having breakfast and beginning my work. I felt healthy and energetic and was very productive.

Life is what happens to you while your busy making other plans

Then three weeks ago I unexpectedly (is it ever expected!!!) broke my ankle when I crashed into my son on a waterslide. Last week after another xray my specialist decided to insert a plate and screws into my fibular as the fracture had become displaced. I had all these plans of things I would like to do in October and November and I’m spending most of  my time in hospitals and doctors surgeries. I now find myself rising at 8.30 and taking an hour and a half to have breakfast, clean up and have a shower. I’m eating more than I should and starting to feel a bit blarrrrrr.

Feeling sorry for myself

At the time it happened I commented that I would rather have two broken legs and two broken arms than go through a period of depression again. Whilst that is still true, the full impact of my injury and the limitations it places on me are just starting to really hit home. I can’t drive, so I am restricted to my house and going a bit stir crazy. I can’t put any weight on my broken leg so things like cooking, washing up, cleaning, and working become a real challenge. I’m focussing at everything I can’t do.

Then I saw a movie

On Friday night I watched “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly”. For those who haven’t seen it, it is the true story of the French editor of Elle magazine, who suddenly was struck down by an illness known as “locked in syndrome”.  Whilst his mind was still functioning normally, he lost movement in every muscle except his eyelid. What extraordinary frustration that man suffered as most people saw him as “vegetable” when his mind was still alert.

One blink at a time

Though a very patient speech therapist, he learnt a system whereby he would blink when she said the right letter. They had to go through this agonising process to identify the right letter, which became a word, which became a sentence, which became a paragraph, which became a chapter, which became a book. I thought I had problems writing my two books!!!!!!!!

When I was depressed…

I would have thought “interesting movie but at least he is not depressed”. Thankfully now, I’m not depressed but I’m aware that I have to take action so that I don’t slip back there again. Seeing the movie has helped me realise how “able” I am compared to the “Diving Bell”. Whilst it is difficult, today I am going to recalibrate my weekly goals and realise that I am going to need the assistance from others to get through this period.

My goals for next week

1. Rise by 6.00am, meditate and do 20 minutes of stretching
2. Eat 10% less than I have been eating
3. Reach out to family and friends via phone and email
4. Finalise a telephone seminar course designed to help carers provide the best support to those living with depression.

I’ll let you know how I go.

Kind Regards

Graeme 

Tags: back from the brink, back from the brink too, depression, graeme cowan, stigma

Since the launch of BACK FROM THE BRINK TOO, I have been surprised by the number of parents who have contacted me who are struggling in knowing how to best help a young person with depression. I cover this in some depth in BFTBToo but I wanted to provide a few suggestions here which might be of some assistance.

It is a difficult area, as quite often, there are many social and hormonal things happening in a young person’s life that sometimes it can be diffiulct to separate normal “teenage blues” from a genuine threat to their mental health. The thing that separates clinical depression is a sustained low mood (often combined with changes in sleep patterns and eating habits) everyday for 2 weeks. If this threshold is crossed:

• Always take it seriously
• Encourage your child to seek help by providing a list of relevant contacts (see http://www.iambackfromthebrink.com/resources.html)
• If your teenager won’t ask for help and you are really worried, go to the GP yourself and ask advice.
• Show love and concern. They need to know they have this when they are going through tough times.
• Take time to listen when your teenager wants to talk about their feelings.
• Encourage them to do things they enjoy.
• Take threats of self harm extremely seriously and call the Suicide Callback Service  1300 659 467 or Lifeline immediately for advice 13 11 14
• Make sure you do not keep a gun in your home or shed (especially relevant for farmers)

Where to get help?

The following may be of assistance

• Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (or equivalent)
• your doctor
• parentline (see resources section for local phone number)
• community health centres
• psychologists
• school and/or youth counsellors

Some parents can sometimes be wary of bringing their concerns out into the open for fear of what others will think. It is important you don’t let this get in the way of finding the best support available for your child.

In BFTBToo I also share a headhunting (my previous profession) approach to finding the best person for your child.

Valuable resources

Reachout.com.au factsheets

http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetails.aspx?p=243&np=293&id=2157

As I found with my first book BACK FROM THE BRINK, first hand accounts of people overcoming depression are very powerful - it lets young people know others in there situation have overcome adversity. Reachout.com.au have a great list of these stories from young people. See:

http://www.reachout.com.au/index.asp?mci=11&mwi=1 

Other help sites  for parents trying to assist their children include:

http://www.headspace.org.au/parents-carers/

http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetails.aspx?p=243&np=293&id=2157

If anyone is aware of any other good resources for parents trying to help a young person with depression please let me know.

Kind Regards

Graeme

Tags: adolescent depression, effective treatments for depression, youth depression

Last week I went away with my son and his cousin on a holiday to Forster. We had a great time until we went to a fun park!!! I followed Adam down a water slide. We had a good distance between us but unbeknown to me his mat got caught on the tube.  I crashed into him at great speed and for the first time in my life I broke a bone - a fibula.  Luckily he escaped injury.

This week I was asked to speak at a forum for the Sydney Leadership Centre for Mental Health Week. I raised my leg on the table and said it highlighted the anomaly that existed in Mental Health Week. With a cast on my leg everyone wanted to help me by opening doors, carrying bags, holding lifts, holding food, asking how it happened etc. I couldn’t help comparing this experience with my time when I suffered with depression when many people are too embarrassed or don’t know how to offer help.  Even so called close and lifelong friends would evaporate because they did not know what to say or do.

Why is that we feel reluctant to offer the same level of assistance to those living with a mental illness. To be honest I would rather have two broken legs and two broken arms than have to go through an episode of depression again. I know that depression is much more disabling than a broken bone but in 2008 this is not generally known or acknowledged.

My wish is that when people encounter someone who isn’t coping that they show as much compassion to them as they would if they came across someone in a plaster caste. It’s time we recognized an inequity for what it is. It’s time to start breaking down the stigma walls.

Kind Regards

Graeme

Tags: back from the brink, back from the brink too, depression, graeme cowan, mental health week, stigma